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I am Now a Professional Actor

I took three classes. I had to miss the last class but I feel like I’m ready to move to L.A. now.

My acting teacher may disagree.

I think people assume that I would make a good actor because I can be outgoing and take charge. What people don’t realize is that I am outgoing and take charge so that whatever I am at can end and I can go home and put on sweats. Most of my motivation in a group setting is to get myself out of said group setting and into my pajamas in front of a fire with a good book.

Acting is generally done in a group setting. And not a commingling one. And when your acting teacher asks what the motivation of the character is, the answer is not always: “To get home and put on pajamas.”

This causes me angst.

I had a hard time with the group exercises. I did them and I did my best to be make crazy noises and do actions and be different than I normally am. I don’t think I did that very well. On the bright side, I’ve decided that I like who I am and maybe I don’t need to be different. Or I just learned how to pretend that I like who I am so I don’t have to act which, if you think about it, is acting so maybe I’m really advanced.

Then we were supposed to act in front of others. I decided to go for something easy. So I was really excited when the teacher gave me a soliloquy from King Lear.

I just had to read and interpret and get some feelings across on the following passage:

Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! rage! blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drench’d our steeples, drown’d the cocks!
You sulphurous and thought-executing fires,
Vaunt-couriers to oak-cleaving thunderbolts,
Singe my white head! And thou, all-shaking thunder,
Smite flat the thick rotundity o’ the world!
Crack nature’s moulds, an germens spill at once,
That make ingrateful man!

Rumble thy bellyful! Spit, fire! spout, rain!
Nor rain, wind, thunder, fire, are my daughters:
I tax not you, you elements, with unkindness;
I never gave you kingdom, call’d you children,
You owe me no subscription: then let fall
Your horrible pleasure: here I stand, your slave,
A poor, infirm, weak, and despised old man:
But yet I call you servile ministers,
That have with two pernicious daughters join’d
Your high engender’d battles ‘gainst a head
So old and white as this. O! O! ’tis foul!

No biggie.

Except it was in front of the group and that part made me nervous. And then I told the teacher how nervous I was and he told me a story about a student who would get so nervous she would itch. Then I started itching. So he told me I was next before something else happened.

I read it like a parent of teenagers because I am a parent of teenagers and so I know how King Lear felt. (Not really but sort of. I’m sure Anthony Hopkins’ version on Amazon Prime is a little better.)

Afterwards, people complimented me. I was unsure if I actually did a good job or if my fear was so obvious that they felt sorry for me and wanted to make sure I was okay. It doesn’t matter. I took the compliments anyway.

Now I can check one more thing off of my bucket list.

Excuse me while I go put on some sweats.

These will go nicely with the pajamas, fire and book.

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