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Practicing law during the Apocalypse

Technically, I’m a lawyer.  An attorney.  An esquire.  But only technically.

I graduated law school pregnant with my first kid and took the Montana Bar Exam pregnant with my second kid.  (I had my third kid randomly, without any ties to the legal profession whatsoever.  It seemed really wild and crazy at the time.)

I hope to never actually practice law.  I don’t even answer friendly law questions.  I just smile and tell people to get an attorney.

This weekend I will be attending continuing law classes to stay an active member of the bar.  My husband thinks it’s important.  And he likes to go skiing once a year and have it count as a business expense.  I spend the weekend knitting and nodding.  The law isn’t really my thing.

Recently, at a dinner party, someone asked me if there was an Apocalypse and I was the only attorney in the world, would I practice.  (It is 2012, after all.  We really should be asking questions like this.)

I responded: “If the whole world is pretty much destroyed and two people are so angry with each other they want to go to court, I would reinstate dueling.  With large weapons.”

I stand by my answer.

Apocalypse pictures are very disturbing. Here is a local ghost town instead. The suburban had been abandoned at least 15 minutes.


  1. le0pard13 says:

    There should be more like you, Marianne.

  2. Rebecca Stanfel says:

    I agree with leopard13. There should be more like you, Marianne…ESQ.

    This made me laugh at loud, and I’m not the laugh out loud type, especially these past few days when I’ve been downright sour.

    Here’s to skiing and CLEing, large weapon dueling, and staying out of the practice of law. And Comedy of Errers.

  3. Will says:

    The happiest day of my life was when I could tell people that I used to be a lawyer.

  4. Trish Loye Elliott says:

    I love the idea of dueling. I’d vote for you for president!

  5. educlaytion says:

    A lawyer who doesn’t really like law. As a government teacher who doesn’t really like government I get that.

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